come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize
