know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
