we'll go far in life on tits alone.
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
Randomize
