i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
If you fucking touch my phone and text people, drunk or sober, ever again, i will shove a swizle stick up your pee hole.
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