And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
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