So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
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