I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
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