Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
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