I heard we made out
I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
last night I used snow as a chaser
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
