Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
Randomize
