he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
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