i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
