its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
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