Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
Using the balance in my bank account I just calculated how many fifths of vodka I can buy this year. Don't let me buy food, all my money is reserved for alcohol
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
Randomize
