Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
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