Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
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