when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Randomize
