oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
Randomize
