I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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