Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
Randomize
