I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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