First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
