these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
