Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
The lady at the Humaine Society gave me her nephew's number because I seem like a loving and caring person.
Does she know that each time you've adopted a new cat in the past year it's because some guy stopped fucking you and you don't want to eat your feelings?
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
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