quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize
