k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
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