you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
I have grass duct taped all over my body
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
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