actually, I'm a sock model
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
Randomize
