If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
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