i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
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