I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
Randomize
