Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Randomize
