weddingsv make me drug and hornr
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
Randomize
