How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
