Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
I love you. Go after that dick
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
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