Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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