I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
