ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
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