I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
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I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
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I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
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