I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
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