Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Randomize
