Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
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