I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
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