we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
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