She's JV to your varsity
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
The lady at the touchless car wash just gave me the look of death. How do I say, "sorry it's not my puke" in Spanish?
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
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