Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
I wish there were birth control emojis
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize
