I must be too annoying 4 u.
Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Randomize
