maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Randomize
