You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
He left a cum stain in the shape of a heart on my sheets.
He's like the Bob Ross of love stains.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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