we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
You know what's awkward? Being with your girlfriend and seeing her ex-boyfriend that she left for you while you've got a Ron Burgundy level awkward boner.
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
