so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Randomize
