quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Randomize
